How Music Snatched me Bald This Week
Kid Fury, a great modern philosopher, often compares Beyoncé Knowles-Carter’s combination of vocal ability, performance expertise and undeniable beauty to ones edges being violently snatched from ones scalp. This has always resonated with me, because there’s no doubt that Queen Bey has a way of throwing so much greatness in your face all at once that it’s just rude, it’s so unexpectedly mesmerizing that I often feel like a part of my being, like my baby hairs, has been ripped away without warning – but I don’t mind at all.
This week, the world of hip-hop and R&B has left me near bald yet again. It all started with Janelle Monae’s release of her latest video for “Electric Lady.” This song has always been a favorite of mine – it’s fun and upbeat, and the way you’re seamlessly introduced to its infectious beat after “Q.U.E.E.N.” on Monae’s album always gets me. But the visual for the song is even better. In it, Monae literally lets her hair down, revealing the most beautiful array of natural curls that I’ve ever seen, and gets down at what looks like the college house party of my dreams – there’s dancing, stepping, and also a T.I. appearance (plus cameos from Kimbra, T-Boz, Esperanza Spaulding, Monica, and Estelle) It was too good. Edges: gone.
Next, hip-hop legend Remy Ma came home. After serving 6 years in a woman’s correctional facility (“Orange is the New Black” realness) the rapper was finally released this week. However, as soon as she got out, the former Terror Squad member wasted no time. She was in the studio with DJ Khaled the next day and recorded a “They Don’t Love You No More” Remix, and believe me, her verse sounds like six years of preparation – it’s fire. However, I as well as many other fans didn’t even get the chance to process her homecoming yet; to hope, to dream about the possibilities before she decided to unleash this. Edges: burned.
And then, there was Beyoncé. To be honest, I shouldn’t be surprised by her behavior considering the fact that she stole edges across the world like a thief in the night when she unexpectedly dropped the her self-titled album. However, she got me again. Beyoncé casually released a “Flawless” remix this weekend featuring none other than Nicki Minaj. If you haven’t noticed, Nicki’s also been killing it lately. She’s giving great hair, has starred in movies, and has released her best work in years. (“Bang Bang” her collab with Ariana Grande and Jessie J is still at the top of the charts and her much awaited single “Anaconda” is set to release on Tuesday) But on top of all, they decided to just drop a song on us that can only be described as flawless. Not only does Beyonce match Nicki’s level of slay-age as she affirms that she’s the baddest, but she addresses that infamous surveillance video with the line “Of course sometimes s— goes down when it’s a billion dollars on an elevator.” … Bald.
Feel free to enjoy all of this music while I wait for my hair to grow back.
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